Five Months Home

Kellin arrived home five months ago today! And once again, he's taken some huge steps forward over the past week or so!

He has walked across the living room several times ALL BY HIMSELF! When he is walking toward that musical cube, of course! :)

This morning he was trying to scoop food onto his spoon and put it into his mouth (with a lot of help) - but the important part is that he WANTS to put food into his mouth!

He can climb up the stairs! Now for this, I still have to prompt him by touching his arm or leg and telling him "knee up," "stand up," "reach up," etc. but he does all the moving by himself.

This one may seem like a small thing, but while I was putting on his shirt yesterday, Kellin was holding a toy in his hand. As he pushed each arm through the sleeves (which he does on his own now), he shifted the toy to the other hand so it wouldn't be in the way. A little bit of problem-solving that I haven't seen before!

He has started to occasionally use his signs without using our hands when he is especially motivated to get something, such as his cube or blankie.

We have started putting him down for his nap in the living room rather than his crib, which means he has only been sleeping for 15-30 minutes at naptime, which has resulted in him sleeping much better at night! I don't know if this will be the long-term plan, but so far it's an experiment that is working.

And I will leave you with a cute picture of my boys!

Those Who Still Wait . . .

Those who have been following my blog for a while know that every few weeks, I try to do a post about children who are still waiting to be chosen by a family. Today I have the privilege of sharing with you that one of the children I have blogged about now HAS A FAMILY!

Remember Simon? He is the child that is living in an excellent foster care program but was about to be returned to his orphanage (which did not have a school equipped to teach him because of his visual impairment). He has a family! Which means he can STAY at his foster home until they come! One less orphan!

 

Simon will be such a blessing to his new family!

Now I'd like to tell you about another child recently listed on Reece's Rainbow. This little guy is known as Quinntavius.

Isn't he the CUTEST?
http://reecesrainbow.org/93916/quinntavius

Here is what I know about this sweet little boy. He is three years old. His only diagnosed special needs are a missing right hand and a droopy eyelid - both pretty minor issues. However, a recent update indicates that his skills are delayed in all areas, likely due to the orphanage environment where he lives. It appears that he may spend much of his time in a crib with limited interaction with people and toys. In his pictures, he appears to be pretty well-nourished; however, indications are that he is may be only bottle-fed with no solid food yet. In the video, he is shown crawling around a room (pretty well, too!) but when the caregivers in the room speak to him or try to give him toys, he looks scared and moves away. None of his recent pictures or videos show him smiling.

Does any of this sound familiar? This is very similar to what we found with our Kellin. A child with a special need that does not need to be limiting, but who is judged by caretakers to be unable to do things, and so is neglected and ignored. In fact, Quinntavius appears to have MORE skills than Kellin did at adoption - Quinntavius can crawl, he responds to voices, and he doesn't appear to be underweight. I mention this because, if you have followed this blog, you know that Kellin has made HUGE gains in the past 5 months. At his adoption, he was too weak to sit up, he had only ever eaten from bottles and was significantly underweight, he was uncomfortable with being held and touched, and he couldn't or wouldn't hold anything in his hands or play with anything. Now, 5 months later, Kellin sits, crawls, and walks. He drinks from a cup, eats from a spoon, and picks up some finger foods. He has gained over three pounds. He loves to be held and cuddled. He picks up all kinds of things, plays with toys, and has favorite toys. The love and attention of a family makes all the difference! I believe that Quinntavius has extraordinary untapped potential. There MUST be a family out there who would be blessed to adopt this little boy into their family! Please share, pray, donate, adopt - whatever you can do! Quinntavius needs OUT of his orphanage now!

An Eventful Family Vacation

This past weekend we attempted our first family vacation since Kellin came home. We drove several hours, stayed away from home three nights, and did not follow our familiar routine. And guess what? Kellin did just fine! He decided he liked his car seat (thank goodness - at first he HATED it) and slept just fine in his stroller, car seat, playpen, and once in a high chair at a restaurant.

Too cute!

He was even willing to eat even when he wasn't in his usual chair! He didn't eat as much as he usually does, but at least he ate something! Up until recently, he would refuse to eat anything at all if he was out in public or out of routine.

Now of course, all was not perfect. We stayed at a large hotel that had an indoor waterpark, thinking that it would be great to have something right in the hotel for us to do, especially if the weather wasn't nice enough for outside activities. So the first evening we all went down to the waterpark. It turns out that this particular waterpark is VERY loud, not only with the noises you'd expect like kids shouting and water splashing, but also from a huge bucket of water that dumped every few minutes in the LITTLE KIDS' SECTION (what were they thinking?) and from the music that was blaring at full volume. You couldn't speak to anyone, even right next to you, without screaming. As much as Kellin loves water, he couldn't handle the noise and cried for about half an hour before I gave up and left. Pooh also decided it was too loud and spent most of his time sitting with his hands over his ears. And THEN, Rabbit slipped at the end of a waterslide and hurt her foot. So I took three kids back to the room, while Tigger stayed to enjoy the fun with Daddy.

Rabbit continued to complain about her foot hurting all evening and it started to swell up. She and I spent the next morning at Urgent Care and were informed that she had fractured a bone in her foot. The doctor splinted the foot and gave her a pair of crutches. So much for the biking and walking we had wanted to do. (Follow up - Rabbit saw the orthopedic doctor this morning and she will need to stay off her foot for about a month - and has to wait probably 8 weeks before going back to gymnastics. So she is not happy.) But we managed to find things to do. Rabbit is very fast on her crutches and in general she is strong and active, so she kept up for short walks. We went on a Pizza Cruise (a boat ride around the lake with pizza served) and checked out a museum and a few stores. Overall, a memorable and (mostly) enjoyable trip. I am relieved to know that Kellin is becoming more able to tolerate new experiences and places without becoming completely stressed out.

And . . . we took some pretty good pictures!

I know I have not done a thorough Kellin update in a while. Part of the reason is that I feel that Kellin's progress is slowing down. He is still making progress but it's no longer the "something new every day" kind of progress. Some of his newest skills:

Continuing to make slow progress toward self-feeding. He will pick up puffs with his finger and thumb (sometimes) and put them in his mouth. He is also tolerating it (sometimes) when I wrap his fingers around the spoon have him help me move it to his mouth. He's doing a nice job drinking from a cup on his own. However, I have also seen recently that he is chewing less than he used to - instead, he is storing up food in his cheeks, sometimes for long periods of time. And I have also been trying to get him to learn to take a bite off of food - he has NO idea how to do this.

Helping to dress/undress himself - he is really getting this! He helps pull shirts over his head (both on and off), puts his arms through, stands up for snapping onesies, and helps to pull up his pants.

"Communication" - he is using more sounds and a lot more combinations of sounds that sound like words (but aren't really - or at least we don't know what they mean).

Showing SLIGHTLY more motivation to move around and explore things. This has been a long-standing issue for Kellin - he is generally very content to stay in one place, and if he isn't, he will just fuss and wait for someone to come, rather than trying to move himself (although he is perfectly capable of crawling and/or taking a few steps). I say slightly though, because there is plenty of room for improvement. Not quite sure how to teach this kind of a skill.

Increasing tolerance for textures - he now likes to play with squishy, gooey stuff like yogurt and baby food. And of course he LOVES water! He's not as sure about things like grass, sand, popcorn kernels, and rocks, but he is getting better at tolerating them for short periods of time.

Back-and-forth games like playing catch - he now LOVES this and will giggle and giggle. He still needs someone to help him throw and catch the ball, but he really seems to get the idea. He tries to throw but just can't quite figure out how to let go. And he is just delighted when it comes sailing back to him.

Awareness of his brothers - for a long time, I felt that Rabbit was the only sibling Kellin really noticed, probably because she is old enough to relate to him more as an adult, rather than as another child. But lately, I feel like Kellin is really starting to notice and enjoy his brothers. :-)

That's probably enough for now - I will try to do a more organized update soon!

Summer Fun

This is what summer fun looks like! This was all going on in our backyard yesterday morning.

Drawing in the "tree fort"

I think Tigger is going to be a runner just like his dad

Pooh with a neighborhood friend

And guess who LOVES water?

Excitement!

Exciting breakthroughs with Kellin's eating over the past week! First of all, he is eating - really eating - a good amount at each meal, sometimes up to two containers of baby food or yogurt in one sitting. We are using the chunky baby food for some of his meals, and he's doing a great job chewing/mashing the chunks before swallowing. I finally feel like he's eating a substantial amount and not just getting all of his calories from his bottles. And for the REALLY big news - Kellin can feed himself! He picks up puffs from his tray and puts them into his mouth. He chews and swallows and doesn't gag nearly as much as he used to. It is SO exciting to see him (sort of) enjoying food.

And . . . the child that would not touch any food with his fingers and HATED being messy - just give him some yogurt to play with! I was holding him on my lap for this picture and you can see me trying to lean away as Kellin sprays yogurt everywhere. Boy, did he have fun!

After I cleaned him up and he was all wet - yep, he loved that too.

And some cute pictures of Kellin with a new favorite toy -

Tonight we ate out a restaurant, which is something we haven't attempted too many times with Kellin. He's very unpredictable in public, often clingy and fussy. Tonight he sat happily in the booth and played with a toy, and after a while, he scooted over and snuggled up close to Pooh. It was actually cuter than this, but we tried to get a picture. Kellin is really becoming more aware of his brothers.

In general, things we are working on with Kellin:
-Walking - still not his favorite activity but he will walk if you hold one hand and even sometimes take a few steps on his own.
-Helping with dressing - he will help push and pull his arms through the sleeves of his shirt and helps pull the shirt over his head, he stands up for pulling up pants and is just starting to help with that a little (if we take his hands and do it with him); he's a master at taking off his socks!
-Playing with toys that are not musical, so he has to explore a little more - this depends on his mood. Sometimes he is content with balls, cups, rings, bucket, etc. and other times he only wants his precious cube toy (or something similar). He is good at dumping the shapes out of his shape sorter bucket but needs a lot of help to put them back in. He is starting (a little) to get the idea of taking turns - playing "catch," passing his cube back and forth - with LOTS of help.
-Crawling up the stairs - he needs someone to move his legs through the process but I think he's starting to get the idea.
-Books! Kellin had no idea what books were, so we try to read to him every day, using books that have textures, sounds, and/or Braille. He's not a huge fan but is getting used to it and has a couple books that he prefers over others.
-Communication - we are always hoping that Kellin will figure out how to tell us things. He is saying more babbling sounds but no consistent words. He often says "mama, yeah, on," but even though they sound like words, they don't really seem to mean anything. It seemed like he said "bath" one night, but it hasn't happened again. We talk to him, sing to him, use signs, play CD's, and anything else we can think of to help him figure out language. I have to believe it will come eventually.

Thankfulness, Early Intervention, and a Plea

Thankfulness:

Over the past year, I have become connected through the internet to a large network of people who are involved in the adoption process - those who are just beginning, those who are close to meeting their child(ren), and those who have already adopted.  In getting to know these people, I have heard many stories of adopting parents being on the receiving end of negative comments about their decision to adopt, not just from strangers or acquaintances, but from family, friends, church members, co-workers, etc.    This astounds me.  In the 13 months since we began the adoption process for Kellin, do you know how many negative comments we've received?  NONE.  I can't remember a single person saying or implying that we were making a poor decision when we decided to adopt Kellin.  Surprised, yes, we encountered a lot of surprised people.  Uninformed, yes, lots of people didn't really understand.  But no negativity.  From anyone.

I am so thankful.  Our families have embraced Kellin as one of our own.  Our friends have all been supportive.  And because I work in special education, I am surrounded by people who love special children and have been celebrating all of Kellin's accomplishments right along with us.  It's overwhelming.  Yesterday a group of co-workers threw a baby shower for us.  Kellin received so many wonderful new toys and clothes, and much-appreciated diapers.  Kellin was there, and while he handled it pretty well (for him), there was still some fussing and shutting down because of all the noise and new voices.  The support in that room was amazing and I am so blessed to work with such caring, accepting people.

Early Intervention:

As an early childhood special education teacher, I believe very strongly in early intervention services for children with special needs (meaning therapies and support for parents while a child is an infant, toddler, and preschooler).  Kellin is already benefiting from the excellent services our school district provides.  But I find myself thinking - what if he could have been receiving those services from the time he was a baby, age one, age two?  What difference could that have made in his life?  Certainly he would have many more skills than he does after spending those critical first years in a crib.

I want to show you a picture of a child who has recently been listed for adoption.  She is a baby girl, only a few months old, and she is blind.  It is a wonderful opportunity for her to be listed at such a young age and have the chance to come home to a loving family and benefit from early intervention services.  I don't know anything about her orphanage (and no, she is not in China, like Kellin), so I can't say for sure, but if not adopted, will her situation be similar to Kellin's?  Will she lay in a crib, for the most part ignored?  I desperately don't want that to happen.  She needs help NOW.

Gabriella
http://reecesrainbow.org/90944/gabriella

A Plea:

One more story of a child who desperately needs a family.  This little boy is six years old, turning seven in June.  He is blind and living in an excellent foster home.  But if a family is not found by his seventh birthday, he will be sent back to his orphanage, which does not have a school equipped to teach him.  This means he will not have the opportunity for an appropriate education, which of course significantly impacts his future.

Simon
http://reecesrainbow.org/86198/simon

In my next post, I'll share more about Kellin and his progress - but for today, please see these two precious children.  Pray for them, share about them, donate to their funds.  Do something crazy and decide to adopt one yourself.  I promise it can be done.

Four Months Home

Kellin has been home four months, so here's a look at how far he's come! I will say that his progress doesn't seem to have jumped ahead as much in the last couple weeks, but when you compare him to four months ago . . . wow!

Sleeping: When he first came home, Kellin was a HORRIBLE sleeper. He was up for several hours each night, and there really wasn't much we could do to help him because he didn't really want to be held or rocked, and then was tired and fussy all day. Now he sleeps through most nights (although not all - every week or two, he has a night where he has difficulty), and he has a pretty regular nap, although he misses that occasionally too. When he is up in the night, we can often bring him in bed with us and that helps him fall back asleep. This doesn't work every single time, but often enough that we can count on getting decent sleep most nights. Phew!

Eating: When he came home, Kellin ate only from bottles, refusing all spoons and solids. Now he eats yogurt and baby food from a spoon, and he chews puffs and yogurt bites. He will even lift the puffs to his mout himself - but he won't put them into his mouth, so we still have to help him with that. I am hopeful that now that he is chewing, he will be able to eat a better variety of foods. I think one of our biggest successes is that Kellin doesn't refuse to eat nearly as often as he used to. When I sit down to feed him, I can usually count on him being cooperative and eating a decent amount. Of course, we still use a lot of songs as distractors to keep him eating and happy. One of our main goals for the summer is to move him toward self-feeding. Right now, Kellin doesn't feed himself AT ALL, not even holding his own bottle, but we think he is capable of learning this and will be working hard on it over the summer.

Medical: In general, nothing to report! Kellin has had no red flags come up in any of his medical testing, other than a need for an iron supplement. He is now up-to-date on his immunizations, and up until this morning, we had never seen him sick. The other three kids have had colds and stomach bugs in the months since Kellin has been home, but he has never caught any of that. We've been amazed at how healthy he is! We don't know how much he weighs now, but we hope to get him weighed soon. He hasn't outgrown any of his diapers or clothes yet, but he looks a little fuller in his face and legs, so maybe he has gained a bit.

Motor Skills: In contrast to the limp baby that came home four months ago, Kellin is walking! It's not his favorite thing to do, but if we hold just one of his hands, he will walk to toys or to his bath. He can take a few steps all on his own but is usually hesitant to do so, possibly because of course he can't see what is in front of him. With his hands, we are working getting him to touch different textures (clay, oatmeal, different kinds of cloth, grass, etc.), which he is tolerating more and more, especially if we use songs. We are also working on getting him to use his fingers separately, rather than using his whole hand for everything. To help with this, I try to get him to hold his puffs with just his finger and thumb at meals, I try to get him to use only 1-2 fingers when pushing buttons on a toy or when moving his hands along the Braille in his books during story time, and I sing lots of counting songs with him (helping him to hold up the right number of fingers). I'd like to point out that even though I've mentioned Braille and counting, we are not really expecting him to learn to read and count right now - but it's a great way to combine fine motor skills that he is ready to work on with exposing him to those concepts he will need later.

Communication: I still can't report that Kellin is using any words, but he still uses his four signs (blankie, more, please, all done). He understands many words, and the list of songs that he knows is impressive (we can tell he knows them because he will do the actions as we sing and anticipates which actions are coming next). He also requests songs by showing us the actions. We are working on getting him to babble back-and-forth with us (not too much success yet) and we try to have him listen to songs that emphasize basic sounds (we were given a CD by Kellin's speech therapist). We are hoping to teach him a few more signs, such as signs for his favorite toys. Other than this, we just keep talking and singing, and hope that one day Kellin will figure out this talking thing.

Attachment/Bonding: We think things are going very well! Remember the child I first met that did not know how to be held and couldn't tolerate it for more than a few minutes at a time? Now, Kellin likes to be held and loves to cuddle. He will fall asleep while being held sometimes. He likes hugs and definitely understands the word "hug." He reaches for Daddy (not as much for me, but I think that's pretty normal and we are working on it) and sometimes for big sister. He lets me rock him before bed. He seems to know the difference between his family and strangers and is uncomfortable when he hears strangers' voices or when they touch him. Because he has no language and also no eye contact, sometimes it is hard to tell how exactly he feels about us, but in general we are feeling positive that his attachment to us is getting stronger by the day.

Kellin is now working with a whole team of people - teacher of the visually impaired, early childhood special education teacher, speech therapist, occupational therapist, and physical therapist - who have been coming into our home to give us materials and suggestions about activities that will help Kellin develop and make progress. It has been fantastic to have others coming in and giving us a different perspective and fresh ideas. For example, the physical therapist suggested having Kellin try crawling up a couple steps and also "knee standing" while he played with toys. Within a couple days of trying that . . .

Here's a couple pictures to show what is going on in our house today. I mentioned earlier that Kellin had been healthy up until today. Well, yesterday Pooh got a fever, and now today Kellin has one, too. Did I mention that we were planning to go camping this weekend? Now the plan is for Daddy to take Rabbit and Tigger camping starting this afternoon until Monday, and I will stay home with the two sick three-year-olds.