Two Weeks Home

Kellin has been home two weeks and two days.  He's been with me for four weeks.  For anyone who's wondering how he is doing, I thought I'd attempt a thorough update.

Medical: Kellin has already had a few doctor appointments, and the good news is that nothing unanticipated has come up (yet), at least nothing serious.  He is dangerously underweight (we knew that).  At his first appointment almost two weeks ago, he was 19 1/2 pounds without clothes on.  At his next appointment a week later, he was about 20 1/2 pounds, with clothes on.  So we suspect he really hadn't gained much, but possibly a few ounces.  We have appointments coming up with an orthopedic doctor (because when Kellin gets really upset, he pops his hip - we don't really know what that's all about) and with a pediatric ophthalmologist to hopefully get a solid diagnosis for Kellin's eye condition.  We are not convinced that the diagnosis in his file is accurate.  We also are anxious to find out exactly how much he can see.  We know that it's not much - but he at least has light perception.

Eating: For the most part, this has not changed.  Kellin is still receiving all of his food through a bottle, which now contains a thick mixture of toddler formula, pediasure, rice cereal, baby food, milk, and water.  We try to have him play with food a few times a day, and sometimes he tolerates it if I use my finger to put tiny amounts of baby food into his mouth.  Sometimes he screams.

Sleeping: Kelllin's sleeping is slowly improving.  He is sleeping more hours at a time and when he wakes up at night, he goes back to sleep more easily.  Sometimes he lets us rock him.  We are still limiting his naptime during the day in hopes of getting him to sleep through an entire night.  So we are all getting more sleep - but there is room for improvement.

Attachment/Bonding: We have seen some really great gains in this area.  Kellin really enjoys being held and reaches for us sometimes.  The other day I was sitting on the floor and he was standing at his rocker next to me, when he suddenly turned to me, reached out his arms, and then tried to climb into my lap.  While Kellin has not had much interaction with people outside of our family, it has been clear when we have had appointments that he knows familiar versus unfamiliar people and is more comfortable with us than with strangers.  This is a great first step in the bonding process.

Motor Skills: Kellin is moving around much more than he did just a few weeks ago.  He likes to stand and walk, either by holding our hands or by pushing a toy around.  He can sit steadily and play, although he prefers to lay down on the floor.  He sits on a ride-on train and pushes it backward around the room (he hasn't figured out forward yet) and he sits on a rocker and moves it back and forth.  The other day, he actually lifted one leg over the rocker and got himself off all by himself!  We are working on "tummy time," because we would really like him to learn to crawl.  While he still dislikes being on his tummy, he is tolerating it more and more, and with a lot of help, he will go into a hands-and-knees position for a short time.  He grasps toys, passes them from one hand to the other, and sometimes feels around for them if he drops them.  He moves them around and puts them to his mouth to explore them.  A huge change from the child who would not even hold a toy just four weeks ago!

Communication: No, Kellin is not using any words yet.  However, we have seen that he seems to understand a few basic words - eat, blankie, spoon.  He is very responsive to singing and even sings the tune to "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" to himself.  He babbles quite a bit and has seemed to copy sounds that we babble to him a few times.  He communicates with gestures sometimes - holding out arms to be picked up, reaching for our hands if he wants to stand up or do the actions to a song.  He cries when he doesn't like something.  Some days, it seems like he fusses all day long - which is frustrating, but also encouraging, because those first few days he never cried.  He is certainly becoming comfortable enough to let us know what he wants and doesn't want!  The hard part is that he needs to be pushed out of his comfort zone in order to learn and make progress, so sometimes we do try to have him do things he doesn't really like (like touching food, sitting to play instead of laying down, etc.).

Socially: Kellin is much, much more engaged with people.  He plays along with the actions to songs.  He is willing to hold and explore objects with different textures, shapes, and sounds.  He is stimming much, much less, although we still have to remind him often.  Basically, we are trying to teach him that there are other (more appropriate and fun) things he can do with his hands, other than hitting himself, poking his eyes, or playing with his spit.  We often tell him "hands down" and then hand him a toy or other object as a distraction or start a song that has actions for him to do with his hands.  It is intense some days to stay on top of it - but we are seeing it make a big difference.  I have also noticed that Kellin does have some self-control, because after I have reminded him, sometimes his hand will go back to his face - and then he will stop himself and move his hand away.  He also sometimes stops the stimming if I just say his name or say "hands down," not even touching him.  Some of his stims (like clapping and pulling on his cheeks to open his eyes more) appear to be harmless and we have not attempted to stop them, at least not now.

Overall, we are adjusting.  Some days are discouraging, when it seems that we haven't come very far, but other days, I am in awe of how far Kellin has really come.  We are gearing up to start some more formal therapy with him soon, and I am looking forward to having more direction and suggestions for activities we can do to help him progress.

Our other kids are doing very well.  Rabbit thinks she is Kellin's third parent and is always begging to hold him and play with him.  This has turned out to be a very good thing, because she is old enough to be responsible for him for short periods of time, and she is very good at helping us work on specific skills with him.  It allows us to take a few minutes to clean up, make a phone call, or take care of other quick chores.  Tigger enjoys saying hi to Kellin and talking to him for a minute here and there, but of course Tigger is our little tornado, always on the move, and so I think Kellin is kind of boring to him right now.  Pooh is just the sweetest.  Even though he is technically the little brother (by two months), he has definitely taken on a "big brother" role with Kellin.  He talks to him, brings him toys, sings to him, holds his hand, and is thrilled to "watch" him if I step into the other room for a second.  Kellin is settling in as a very important part of our family, and we are so happy to have him here after all the months of waiting!