Orphan Situation

Imagine this scenario:

A married middle-class couple in the United States is expecting their first baby.  They are joyfully anticipating this addition to their family; they have decorated the nursery and chosen a name.  On the big day, their baby boy is born, but to the couple's surprise, they are informed by the doctor that their baby was born "different" - for the purposes of this scenario, let's say he has a relatively "minor" special need - a missing foot.  The couple is devastated.  They grieve.  They worry about their precious son's future.  The doctor gives them referrals - to medical specialists, therapists, early intervention services, and support groups.  These parents take advantage of the many services available to them and their son and pretty soon they realize that this is not such a big deal.  In most ways, their son grows and develops typically; after a while, he is fitted with a prosthetic leg, and grows into a perfectly independent and successful adult.

Now imagine this same married middle-class couple in another country in this world, joyfully planning for this first child.  The baby is born and is quickly taken out of the room.  The doctor comes to them and informs them that their baby is "different" - he is missing a foot.  The doctor tells them that their baby will never be able to care for himself or attend school.  He recommends that they do not take their baby home and instead place him in an orphanage where he can be properly cared for.  The couple has a devastating decision to make.  They love their son.  But they feel the weight of their culture and society pressuring them to follow the doctor's advice.  After all, they did not see children with disabilities in their schools when they were children.  They have never seen an independent, successful adult with a disability.  They know that their son may not be allowed to attend school.  They may not be able to find a doctor willing to provide medical care to their son.  So they leave him at the hospital, believing they are making the right decision.  The baby boy is placed in an orphanage.  At first, he cries often, until he learns that crying does not bring anyone to care for him, and then he becomes silent.  He is fed on a schedule, diapers changed on a schedule.  Because of his special need, the orphanage staff believe that he is not capable of learning to crawl and walk, and so they leave him in his crib most of the time.  They continue to feed him with bottles even as he grows into a toddler, because it is easier than moving him to a table.  By age three, the little boy is not yet crawling, talking, feeding himself, or toilet-trained.  The staff decide that he must have low intelligence and they continue to deny him opportunities to explore and learn.  At age five, he is transferred to a mental institution where he continues to be treated as a child who is incapable of learning or caring for himself.  He never attends school.  Although he may eventually learn to speak a little and move around his environment, he develops into an adult that is who everyone believed him to be - incapable of independence and appearing to be of low intelligence.

These two scenarios begin with the same couple and the same child, but they have drastically different outcomes.  Is the second scenario extreme?  Yes.  Does it accurately describe the fate of every orphan with special needs?  No, of course not.  Some orphans are cared for in foster homes, by trained caregivers; they are given therapy and education.  But unfortunately, many orphans with special needs do end up in a similar situation to this second scenario.  There are SO MANY orphans with unrealized potential and uncertain futures!

Here is one child who desperately needs a family to help him realize his full potential!  This is NOT our Kellin (for those that may be confused about what I am doing here), but he is a child like our Kellin, a child born with a disability that should not have to limit his opportunities and future, but unfortunately it does in his current situation.  Anyone interested in adopting this sweet little guy? :)

This is Dexter.  He is three years old and his special need is that his  hands are different - missing a finger on one hand and missing the radius in the other.  However, even though this is his only reported special need, he is not yet walking.  And look how skinny and sad he looks here!  More information about adopting Dexter can be found at: http://adoptablewaitingchild.com/portfolio/dexter/